Rouwen doe je niet ff.
Het is niet alleen het dealen met de verlieservaring, het rouwen, de stemmingen, emoties en gedachten die door je heen gaan. Wat zelfs per moment en dagelijks kan verschillen. Het zijn ook de reacties vanuit jouw omgeving. In hoeverre wordt jij uitgenodigd om jouw verhaal te vertellen?
Dit is mijn verhaal:
Hoe voelde rouw voor mij?
Mijn vrouw stierf 28-12-2013 onverwachts op 45-jarige leeftijd naast mij in de auto terwijl wij in gesprek waren.
“Ik lijk emotieloos, verdoofd te zijn voor de buitenwereld, maar de emoties gieren door mij heen. Normaliter was ik stabiel, voel me nu labiel.
Mijn gedachten zijn onrustig en vliegen alle kanten op: niets is meer wat het was, wat moet ik nu, wat doe ik zonder haar, hoe nu verder?
Ik staar, kijk vooruit, maar ik zie niets, ik zie geen toekomst. Het lijkt geen nut te hebben.
Ik wens grip te houden, probeer mij vast te klampen, maar krijg ‘geen voet aan de grond’, voel mij ‘ontworteld’. ‘Ben van mijn grondvesten gescheurd’, geen basis meer, geen ondergrond. Alles wat was, is niet meer!
Behalve één ding: dankzij de liefde die ik voor haar voel, zal de dood ons niet scheiden.
Deze tekening heb ik toen gemaakt. Zo voelde ik mij op dat moment.
Zo heeft ieder mens die rouwt zijn eigen rollercoaster, maar je hoeft het rouwen niet alleen te doen. Wil je bijgestaan en begeleid worden tijdens de rouw op een onvoorwaardelijke manier?
Neem dan contact met mij op: Peter van den Berg, emailadres: info@praktijk-doorleven.nl


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